There was a time I put Twix on my top 10 list. Caramel that was soft, stringy, and thickish, with a cookie bar that had true crunch, surrounded in a pretty decent chocolate for Big Candy. With 2 bars in a package? Twix originals are worth the ducats.

Now, like all enterprising candy companies, especially those considered old school, we have a newish (these were released previously) Twix on the shelf. And as far as I can tell the Cookies & Cream version is only one of three varieties – reg, white and these:

Semi-excited to try these out — partly because I had no other candy in the house and forgot I bought a package 2 months back. Plus, I was hungry for sweets. Usually a good time, for the purveyors, for me to write a review.

I was also keen to see if Twix got the cookies-meets-cream flavor combo right. Because no one else has. Besides maybe ice cream? I can’t think of a single sweet where if I closed my eyes and ate it, I’d be able to pick out cookies and cream as the flavor, over something like… simply… smooth chocolate.

So. Here we are.

And again I’m left wanting.

Twix Cookies & Cream eliminate the actual crunchy vanilla “cookie” from the original, for a chocolate semi-soft biscuit. The cream is soft with chocolate bits in it, as if it’s Oreo-like, but I can’t taste cocoa. Of course the bar is covered in I’m pretty certain the same milk chocolate, so really all I taste is chocolate.

It’s fine. These are sure, whatever. A sweet. Definitely edible. But why would you buy this over the original? The original tastes unique. This doesn’t.

“Gosh I need some cookies and cream,” you say to yourself. So go get some actual cookies. Buy some milk. Dunk said cookies in milk. Gaze out to the horizon, and figure out how to make a bar that TASTES like what you are eating. Then call me. Or actually, email me. I hate phones.